Aswani Nabwende/ September 28, 2018/ GIRL ON TRANSIT/ 2 comments

There is a lot to say about our father, though you have known him in his older years, I can tell you of his younger years. I can tell you of his hard work, his sleepless nights, his tough eyes that kept all boys off my path and his polite smile that could almost hide his ability to whip us thoroughly whenever we disrespected our mother. Father was an active participant in our growth and well being; I can remember him teaching me how to walk and sing lullabies with his crock voice.

But that is not why I want to talk about our father, I would like to tell you more of his reflection on the man you will one day marry. Father has taught us well, took us to the best schools, bought us the best clothes, we have had the best meals and occasionally we would go to exotic places where he spent his hard-earned money to keep a smile on our faces. Father has shown us how we ought to survive when we have and even when we don’t. He has taught us to be content and to love life and the people in it. Father has valued our mother in a way that cannot escape our sight.

He didn’t have much money, but we considered him to be our hero, the richest man in the world. We revere him and regard him as our king. You may not see it now, but the seeds that he continuously cultivates in us are bearing fruits as we mature into young women with our own ambitions and life plans.

Father’s pride and satisfaction can clearly be seen each time we go through a rite of passage. Be it a graduation, confirmation, wedding and many others.

You see, every time he holds my hand to takes me towards my next step in life, he simply gives a faraway smile, almost not letting in on his happy thoughts, am sure you can relate to his facial expression. He holds his head high, holds my hand tight, looks around almost like seeking attention from anyone who cares to look and walks with pride that can be compared to that of the Lions of the jungle. This feeling my sister is a feeling that, you may never understand unless you have had your own share of making the old man proud.

I tell you this to make you understand that even though you have experienced our father’s love in his older years, when he has less energy to use the rod on you literally, he continues to provide you with the best.

There is a lot to say about our father, though you have known him in his older years, I can tell you of his younger years. I can tell you of his hard work, his sleepless nights, his tough eyes that kept all boys off my path and his polite smile that could almost hide his ability to whip us thoroughly whenever we disrespected our mother. Father was an active participant in our growth and wellbeing; I can remember him teaching me how to walk and sing lullabies with his crock voice.

But that is not why I want to talk about our father, I would like to tell you more of his reflection on the man you will one day marry. Father has taught us well, took us to the best schools, bought us the best clothes, we have had the best meals and occasionally we would go to exotic places where he spent his hard-earned money to keep a smile on our faces. Father has shown us how we ought to survive when we have and even when we don’t. He has taught us to be content and to love life and the people in it. Father has valued our mother in a way that cannot escape our sight.

He didn’t have much money, but we considered him to be our hero, the richest man in the world. We revere him and regard him as our king. You may not see it now, but the seeds that he continuously cultivates in us are bearing fruits as we mature into young women with our own ambitions and life plans.

Father’s pride and satisfaction can clearly be seen each time we go through a rite of passage. Be it a graduation, confirmation, wedding and many others.

You see, every time he holds my hand to takes me towards my next step in life, he simply gives a faraway smile, almost not letting in on his happy thoughts, am sure you can relate to his facial expression. He holds his head high, holds my hand tight, looks around almost like seeking attention from anyone who cares to look and walks with pride that can be compared to that of the Lions of the jungle. This feeling my sister is a feeling that, you may never understand unless you have had your own share of making the old man proud.

I tell you this to make you understand that even though you have experienced our father’s love in his older years, when he has less energy to use the rod on you literally, he continues to provide you with the best.

My younger sister, when time comes for you to settle down and start your own family, it will be important that you understand that the man that finds you should have the same spirit that father has used to shape us, a man who not only can love selflessly but also disciplines consistently. A man who will love you with the same love that father has shown to our mother or even more. A man who will be a friend to your sons, a man who will hold your daughter’s hands into her destiny. May the man that finds you have the values that have kept us revering our own father.

Please note that I did say ‘The man who finds you”, for women do not find men, it is not in our place.

During creation, Adam went into a deep sleep so that Eve may be created from his rib. God called Eve ‘woman’ for she came out of man. It is only a man who can identify his missing rib, and not vise visor. It is important that you know your place my sister, for it will save you a lot of trouble and give you so much respect.

Having a man in whom you see your father’s reflection gives you so much comfort, it is easier for him to dedicate his life to you and so much easier for you to submit to his authority.

You are more likely to see what kind of children you are likely to bring up, the kind of life you will get if you can see your father in your husband.

If by chance you did not experience a father figure, it is much easier for you to be found by a man who reflects the father you would have needed.

A bonus point is when he gets along with your father, making you a beloved child and who wouldn’t want such an experience?

Dear sister, your father is your mother’s lifetime partner, the kind of love between them cannot be compared to the love father has for you. Let your own lifetime partner find you, a partner who will continue with the same work father had started of raising you to be an exemplary human being.

Father’s lifetime is totally different from your lifetime, unless God has called you to live in singlehood, dear sister, I pray that my future brother in law will be the man of your dreams, the man that will keep up the standards set by our own father, that will put father in a happy mood for the rest of his lifetime.

Dear sister, go to school and get some higher education. Make a career for yourself and be your own success, but do not be fooled, the right partner for you will never prevent you from achieving your goals. When this partner finds you, do not be afraid to be found, for your life could only get better.

Please note that I did say ‘The man who finds you”, for women do not find men, it is not in our place. During creation, Adam went into a deep sleep so that Eve may be created from his rib. God called Eve ‘woman’ for she came out of man. It is only a man who can identify his missing rib, and not vise visor. It is important that you know your place my sister, for it will save you a lot of trouble and give you so much respect.

Having a man in whom you see your father’s reflection gives you so much comfort, it is easier for him to dedicate his life to you and so much easier for you to submit to his authority.

You are more likely to see what kind of children you are likely to bring up, the kind of life you will get if you can see your father in your husband.

If by chance you did not experience a father figure, it is much easier for you to be found by a man who reflects the father you would have needed.

A bonus point is when he gets along with your father, making you a beloved child and who wouldn’t want such an experience?

Dear sister, your father is your mother’s lifetime partner, the kind of love between them cannot be compared to the love father has for you. Let your own lifetime partner find you, a partner who will continue with the same work father had started of raising you to be an exemplary human being.

Father’s lifetime is totally different from your lifetime, unless God has called you to live in singlehood, dear sister, I pray that my future brother in law will be the man of your dreams, the man that will keep up the standards set by our own father, that will put father in a happy mood for the rest of his lifetime.

Dear sister, go to school and get some higher education. Make a career for yourself and be your own success, but do not be fooled, the right partner for you will never prevent you from achieving your goals. When this partner finds you, do not be afraid to be found, for your life could only get better.

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About Aswani Nabwende

is the author and founder behind Jshare She has been writing as a way of improving her writing skill and enhancing her creativity. Aswani's education background is in Journalism and Mass Communication. She is passionate about people, her mantra is 'no greater wealth than service to humanity'.

2 Comments

  1. Great article!Keep it up girl

      1. Thank you Eva, wonderful work too at empowered lifestyle link.

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